My Struggle with “Durchhalten”: Motivation and Discipline in Germany

Okay, so here I am, six months in Berlin. Six months of incredible coffee, baffling bureaucracy, and a whole lot of trying – and failing – to learn German. It’s amazing, terrifying, and honestly, exhausting. I thought I was pretty disciplined before I came here, you know? I always had a plan, a schedule. But German, and life in Germany, has a way of completely upending your carefully laid plans. It’s all about “Durchhalten” – pushing through – and I’m starting to understand that it’s not just about physical endurance, but mental too.

The Initial Burst of “Ich Will!”

The first few weeks were… exhilarating. I had this incredible burst of motivation. I downloaded Duolingo, bought a phrasebook, and told everyone I met, “Ich lerne Deutsch!” People were so encouraging. I’d spend hours trying to conjugate verbs, convinced I was making incredible progress. I’d even try ordering food in German at the Imbiss – “Ich hätte gerne einen Currywurst, bitte!” – and although I always messed up the pronunciation, the effort felt amazing.

Then, reality hit.

The Reality of “Es Ist Schwer”

Suddenly, ordering food became a monumental task. I’d get completely flustered, start repeating phrases wrong, and end up pointing frantically at the menu. “Was ist das?” I’d ask, completely unsure, and the waiter would patiently explain, “Das ist eine Bratwurst. Sie ist sehr scharf.” (That’s a sausage. It’s very spicy). And I’d be standing there, completely overwhelmed, wishing I’d just stuck to English.

The worst part was the feeling of frustration. I’d tell myself, “Ich muss das schaffen!” (I have to achieve this!), but the words felt hollow. I realized that motivation alone wasn’t enough. I needed something more, something to actually do the work.

Talking About Motivation – Real Conversations

I started trying to have conversations, even short ones. My colleague, Markus, noticed I was struggling. He said, “Alice, warum lernst du Deutsch so schwer?” (Alice, why are you finding German so difficult?). I confessed, “Ich weiß nicht! Ich habe keine Geduld. Ich bin so frustriert!” (I don’t know! I don’t have patience. I’m so frustrated!).

He laughed and said, “Nicht aufgeben! Mach kleine Schritte. Es ist besser, wenn du jeden Tag ein bisschen lernst, als am Wochenende einen ganzen Tag.” (Don’t give up! Make small steps. It’s better if you learn a little bit every day than to learn the whole day on the weekend).

That really stuck with me. He also explained, “Es ist normal, dass man Fehler macht. Jeder lernt anders.” (It’s normal to make mistakes. Everyone learns differently). I realized I was being way too hard on myself.

Discipline – More Than Just a Schedule

I started forcing myself to spend just 30 minutes a day on German – Duolingo, reading a simple children’s book, whatever. It was hard at first. There were days I’d tell myself, “Ich habe keine Zeit!” (I don’t have time!), but I’d remind myself of Markus’s advice. I even started keeping a little notebook and writing down new words and phrases – “Das ist eine gute Übung!” (That’s a good exercise!).

Another thing I found helpful was setting realistic goals. Instead of aiming to “become fluent,” I started aiming for “learn five new verbs this week.” It felt much more manageable, and when I achieved it, the feeling of accomplishment was huge. “Super gemacht!” (Great job!).

Misunderstandings and “Entschuldigung”

Of course, there were plenty of misunderstandings. The other day, I went to the bakery to buy bread. I wanted to ask for a Brötchen (a roll) and completely butchered the pronunciation. The baker looked at me with a confused expression, and I blurted out, “Ich möchte ein Brot!” (I want a bread!). He patiently corrected me, “Nein, nein, ein Brötchen!” (No, no, a roll!). I mumbled, “Entschuldigung!” (Excuse me!) and quickly paid. It was a small thing, but it highlighted how important it was to be observant and to listen carefully.

Learning to Accept “Das Ist Nicht Perfekt”

I’m starting to realize that “perfekt” isn’t the goal. It’s okay to make mistakes. It’s okay to feel frustrated. The key is to keep pushing through, to keep saying “Durchhalten” (persevere), and to celebrate the small victories. I’m still a long way from being fluent, but I’m getting there, one “Ich lerne Deutsch!” at a time.

And honestly, that’s a pretty amazing feeling.