My First Few Months: Talking About Chores in Germany

Okay, deep breath. It’s been six months since I moved to Berlin, and honestly, it’s been a whirlwind. The sheer noise of the city, the language…it’s a lot. But I’m getting there. And something that’s been surprisingly tricky, and actually really important, is just…talking about things. Specifically, about who does what around the apartment. It’s not as simple as “do you want to split the bills?” Let me tell you about it.

The Initial Confusion – “Wer macht was?”

When I first arrived, I assumed everything would be sorted out. My roommate, Lena, is lovely, but our communication was…minimal. We’d look at the electricity bill and just vaguely agree to “wir teilen” (we share), but that was it. Then, the dishes started piling up. Seriously, piling up.

I finally asked her, completely awkwardly, “Lena, wer macht das Geschirr?” (Lena, who does the dishes?). She looked at me like I’d asked her to speak Klingon. “Geschirr? Aber ich habe doch heute Abend Pasta!” (Dishware? But I’m having pasta tonight!). It took a few explanations, and a slightly frantic Google Translate session, to realize she expected me to offer to do them.

Key Phrases & Vocabulary

Let’s talk about the actual words I’ve been using – and learning. Here’s what’s helped the most:

• “Wer macht das…?” (Who does…?) – This is your go-to. “Wer macht die Wäsche?” (Who does the laundry?) “Wer macht den Müll raus?” (Who takes the trash out?)
• “Ich helfe gerne mit.” (I’m happy to help.) – Using this shows willingness and softens the request.
• “Wie teilen wir das auf?” (How do we split this up?) – Good for when things are feeling particularly chaotic.
• “Ich kann das übernehmen.” (I can take that on.) – If someone asks if you can help, this is a good response.
• “Das ist aber meine Aufgabe.” (But that’s my task/responsibility.) – Useful for politely stating what you’re already in charge of. (I accidentally used this a few times when I was still getting used to things!)

A Typical Morning Conversation

This morning, I was trying to get Lena to actually do the dishes. I approached it carefully.

Me: “Lena, guten Morgen! Hast du Zeit, das Geschirr zu machen?” (Lena, good morning! Do you have time to do the dishes?)

Lena: “Oh, jetzt habe ich keine Zeit. Ich muss noch arbeiten.” (Oh, I don’t have time now. I still have to work.)

Me: “Kein Problem! Ich helfe gerne mit! Ich mache das Geschirr.” (No problem! I’m happy to help! I’ll do the dishes.)

She still seemed a little hesitant, but she eventually agreed to load the dishwasher. Small victories!

Mistakes I’ve Made (and How to Avoid Them)

Seriously, I made a lot of mistakes. The biggest one was assuming “wir” automatically meant a 50/50 split for everything. In Germany, things are often more clearly defined. I also initially refused to offer to help – a big cultural difference I was slowly learning.

I learned this the hard way when I avoided doing the cleaning for a week and then got a slightly exasperated “Warum machst du das nicht?” (Why don’t you do it?) from Lena. It was a good reminder to just jump in and offer.

Beyond the Dishes: Other Household Tasks

It’s not just about the dishes. Here’s what else we’ve discussed:

• Müll rausbringen (Taking out the trash) – We decided I’d do it every Wednesday.
• Wäsche waschen (Doing the laundry) – Lena washes hers, I take turns washing mine.
• Einkaufen (Grocery shopping) – We have a shared list and try to split the cost.
• Reinigen (Cleaning) – This is…still a work in progress! We’re slowly establishing a cleaning schedule.

My Advice to Newcomers

Honestly, learning to talk about household responsibilities in Germany felt like a mini-culture shock. It’s not just about the tasks themselves, it’s about the approach. Be proactive, offer to help, and don’t be afraid to ask questions (even if you have to Google Translate them!). And remember, a little bit of open communication can go a long way in making your new home feel a little more like home.

“Los geht’s!” (Let’s go!) – Time to tackle the washing up.